Today is Pajama Day at my children's school.
While I, for one, will not spend one cent on buying pajamas for poor children. Pardon me, my charity donations are personal and go where I designate them.
This is a school project, at the outset of Spring when all stores have switched their wardrobe selection to cruise wear, if not summer camp must haves, parents, who are already paying gobs of tuition, are now asked to scour stores looking for warm winter pajamas to donate to the needy.
Do your children actually still wear pajamas? Mine most frequently wear sweat shirts and sweat pants, or other outerwear.
Honestly, I am not sure how Pajama Day got perverted in to a charity drive, I would like to take this opportunity to address a more serious issue in our home and school community: Diversity.
I mean really isn't that truly a concern parents have sending their child to an insular Jewish Day School, that it is lacking in diversity?
No, I am not suggesting mandatory viewing of the Australian aboriginally dressed Russian Olympic Ice Skating Competition (I'll just bet that is where you thought this was going).
I am advocating Divorce Day!
I think there is not enough divorce awareness out there in the school.
Do we have a Divorcee Melava Malka? No.
What about a Divorce color war? Believe me these teams practically self divide, really I think it is a no brainer.
Our children are missing diversity awareness.
These privileged children are not exposed to the divorce enough.
They understand that some parents can not and are not buying pajamas for the needy, they are also not buying $16 "Sugarlips" stretchy sleeveless undershirts for their third grader.
How about awareness that there are actually mom's out there doing it all--from having the gutter replaced to sending in the financial aid forms (and who are not going to double the deposit because there are 2 sets of information to be processed for one child of divorced parents).
Perhaps the PTA could make the divorced mom's breakfast--forget the pancakes--we'll take extra strong coffee, and lactose free milk (the fact that our digestion is shot should come as no great surprise to anyone here) and chocolate straight up.
Those divorced dads sit in a large ball pit (equipped with baseballs, if you please) and we could model this activity after that famous Purim carnival booth, something like hit the clown with the wet sponge, only with the baseballs?
Another initiative I would like to recommend to the PTA is to reconfigure the development mailing list. It is simple and the figures remain the same. Just replace all divorced moms with the dad's mailing. It is highly likely they will not have read the first mailing anyway so better to send two. Really this is undoubtedly a more effective development strategy.
On Divorce Day, after hearing Hatikva and the Pledge of Allegiance the PA system should play the appropriate Chrisitne Lavin song "Happy Divorce Day": "though it's with sadness we arrived here, we leave with lighter hearts, knowing some of us are better off when we are apart".
The rest of the lyrics are linked here: http://www.christinelavin.com/index.php?page=songs&display=226&category=Shining_My_Flashlight_on_the_Moon
Lastly, I want to propose a "More than Mother's Day Celebration". It is the mother who sometimes calls every grandparent, neighbor, cousin, friend or tangential acquaintance to get a copy of the homework, bring the Oreos on October the 13th, borrow the last minute costume, pick up a child, or take a child to the doctor. That would be the same single mother whose ends rarely meet, those are the same split ends of her own hair that are yet to be ripped out of her head in frustration, cleans the toilets, makes the decisions, and doctor's appointments (and puts them on the Google calendar) routinely forgoes sleep, makes and enforces rules and is often treated to the thankless thoughtlessness, and the needless nasties in heaping helpings.
End of Rant.